Sometimes, I feel like I am in love with a porcupine, a very cute porcupine. This porcupine has some very, VERY good qualities and a good heart. But it is covered in sharp, painful quills. It just seems like every time I let down my guard and get close – OUCH!!
I want to trust the porcupine – OUCH!! I get stabbed by the LIE Quills.
I want to believe things will change – OUCH!! The addiction quills!!
It hurts.
But I still love the porcupine.
Is it his fault for hurting me, or is he just being what he is?
Is it my fault for trying to love a porcupine?
Or do I just need some sleep?
GatherStones 
If you are in a relationship with someone who hurts you emotionally, mentally or physically please get help! Things do not get better! I promise you. My husband started out calling me names, progressed over the years to pushing just once, then anger flare ups, then put his hands around my throat three different occasions. Over time I felt stupid, unable to remember anything, unable to do anything right and had no self esteem. Find some friends who will support you. Get help. You do not deserve to be unhappy. I didn’t do anything that warranted my husband’s abuse. He was sick and made me and our son sick. Please don’t accept the status you are in. I am healing now. He died 8 years ago and my son still carries emotional scars just from hearing what went on. Take care of yourself.
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I am so sorry you endured such abuse. It took great courage for you to escape and courage to share. My prayers are with you and your son. You are clearly an amazing, strong, loving person and I hope that helps you both heal. Thank you. In my case, there is no verbal or physical abuse – just the lies and addiction. But you are right, that wounds too. I feel responsible for his safety – but I am learning, I am not responsible “FOR” him. He must fight his own demons.
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Thank you. I am sorry if I ranted but this is still so close to my heart. Can you find an alanon group to help you. If you have children they will be affected by his behavior. Glad you are not being abused. You are precious and dear. But you can not help him. He has to want to help himself and that is a long journey. Prayers for you and your family.
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Thank you for caring. Caring is not a rant and I am grateful. My husband and I lost our only child – that has exacerbated his addictions and my loneliness. I believe in the power of prayers and I am so thankful
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Under that kind of strain…, I can not imagine. Many have anger at God and have to have time to deal with the grief. I am so sorry for your lost. When my son was little, I teared up thinking how horrible it would be to loose him. My heart goes out to you both.
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Thank you. Today is a breakthrough day. I am seeking GOD’s way today.
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Absolutely right. Just take care of yourself and your kids.
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